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Brooks Barnhizer seemed poised for a breakout year. As a junior at Northwestern in 2023, he was the second-leading player behind star senior Boo Buie. Buie drew the spotlight with clutch buzzer-beaters, while Barnhizer contributed across the board in points, rebounds, steals, assists, and blocks. Together, they guided the Wildcats to only their third NCAA Tournament appearance in program history.
Entering the 2024-25 season, expectations soared for Barnhizer to lead the team. The aim was not merely to return to the tournament but to achieve unprecedented success there. He prepared rigorously, practicing with the team Monday through Friday and then flying to New Jersey on Friday nights for additional workouts with NBA trainers on Saturday and Sunday before returning to Evanston. "He is one of the hardest-working players I have ever coached," said assistant coach Brian James, who retired from Northwestern in June.
However, a summer foot injury delayed Barnhizer's highly anticipated return, forcing him to miss the first few games for rehabilitation. On February 1, 2025, after playing 17 games and averaging 17.1 points per game, he did not suit up. In an emotional post-game press conference, head coach Chris Collins announced that Barnhizer would miss the rest of the season due to a reinjury of his foot five games earlier. Despite needing surgery, Barnhizer was reluctant to end his college career. "Being the way Brooks is, he begged me to play," Collins said. "He said, 'I gotta put the jersey on one more time.'"
After a strong performance in the game following the injury, the decision was made to take it game by game. Eventually, Collins asked Barnhizer to mentor forward Nick Martinelli in running the team. "I put Brooks in charge... to be Nick's whisperer... to be there every game, and be that strong voice and be that person who Nick sees to help him... becoming a star player," Collins said.
It was supposed to be Brooks's year. And then it wasn't. It was Nick's.
The Silent Operator
In simple terms, envy is wanting what someone else has. While everyone experiences envy, it is rarely discussed. Not only is it unpleasant, but it is also socially unacceptable. Most people believe that the problem with envy is that it is inherently evil, igniting greed and hate and potentially leading to theft, slander, or violence. The real problem with envy, however, is that we are oblivious to how much and how often it operates in our lives and that we allow this to happen. It slips in, makes us uncomfortable, and we avoid or ignore it. By doing so, we allow it to influence our thoughts and behavior. When we bottle up negative emotions, they tend to seep out in unexpected, uncontrollable, and unwanted ways.
Envy can be flipped: it can be the poison that flows from toxic comparisons or a potion that reveals purpose and connection. You can dismiss envy as something bad, or you can examine your envy and harness it for good.
Envy in Sports
Sports is not only a breeding ground for envy but also offers public examples of the many ways envy can operate in anyone's life. This is because contrasts are easy to make in sports. Envy results from making upward comparisons. If you have many opportunities or the tendency to juxtapose your situation against someone else's, you are more likely to find instances when you are behind and hence feel envy. In sports, players' physical abilities are measurable in concrete terms, and the competition between players and teams is on display for all to see. Differences are obvious.
"In other domains, not so, but in sports, comparisons are harder to escape, especially in a context where the people involved are experts," said Sara Protasi, a philosophy professor at the University of Puget Sound who studies envy. Moreover, every sport has defined rules for behavior, space boundaries, and time limits. Perhaps this is why a bit of rivalry, physical force, and ambition in sports are socially acceptable and not hidden from view but sometimes even celebrated. Sports therefore offer us examples of envy in plain sight so we can see just how insidious its power can be, not just for evil but for good.
And here is where Brooks Barnhizer comes in. His story highlights different ways to respond to envy, making them easier to see.
Early Challenges in Irvington, Alabama
Brooks started playing basketball early and often. Not only was he born in Indiana, where kids begin playing soon after walking, but he was also born to a renowned high school basketball coach, Mark Barnhizer. Both he and his older brother, Braxton, grew up in the gym starting at 5:30 a.m. every morning, including Christmas. "The boys would wake up Christmas morning, and they would want to go shoot. Their Christmas morning workouts were fun times because nobody else was in the gym," said Heidi Barnhizer, Brooks's mom.
When Brooks was in the seventh grade and Braxton in eighth, his dad was offered a job coaching basketball at Alma Bryant High School in Irvington, Alabama. Mark Barnhizer agreed to take the job only after learning that Alabama was one of a handful of states that allowed middle-schoolers to play varsity. The plan was for Brooks to wait a year and play JV before joining the high school team. When the family arrived, however, the program was worse off than expected. Coach Barnhizer had both of his sons play. The other boys at the school were not happy. "You're on the team because your dad's the coach. Yeah, that's what they said to my face," Brooks recalled. "Seventh graders usually don't play up, so it was definitely a challenge."
Four Components of Envy
To understand envy, it helps to identify four key components. First, someone else not so far off from the envier possesses the thing the envier wants. This similar target is someone within reach of the envier. We often envy our classmates, friends, and co-workers, and not teachers, strangers, or bosses. Second, the envier picks a domain that is important to him or her. This relevant comparison often happens so quickly that the envier isn't always aware. The boys who envied Brooks the most were likely the ones who played basketball. Third, envy reveals what we want. But here is where we often go wrong. We assume envy involves wanting things we can see, like beauty or money. The core of our longing, however, is intangible desire—what we feel. Finally, the envier experiences an ache, pain, or discomfort. These negative emotions stem from both the lack of what is wanted and the sense of inferiority from the comparison. It can also make us feel guilty or embarrassed and want to suppress or deny the feeling.
If we were to map these components of envy, it might be as follows: The boys saw Brooks, a new kid at school (similar target), play some ball during PE and expected to compete against him in tryouts for the middle school team (relevant comparison). The boys who tried out wanted to be a part of the team (intangible desire). But when they saw Brooks make the high school team, they felt the pain of inferiority and unfairness (negative emotion). They gossiped and didn't respond well.
Flipping the Switch
Meanwhile, Brooks had a more useful response to his own envy. Specifically, how he started loving basketball was a moment of envy. "The earliest memory of me loving the game wasn't me playing. It was me watching. Watching my dad coach, watching the players that play for him play. I loved how competitive it was," Brooks said. "Whenever he would lose, I would always get, not sad, but mad, like 'When I grow up and play for him, we're not ever going to lose.' I don't ever want him to lose," he said. Brooks felt both envious and jealous of the boys who played for his dad.
During that first year playing as a seventh grader for his dad's high school team, when Brooks sensed others' animosity, he kept his focus on basketball. "It made me grow closer not only to my family but also to the game. I had to prove that first game that I belonged," he said. The hard work paid off. "I scored seventeen points," he said. "And it was funny, by halfway through that year, everybody was probably, like, my biggest fan in the town, and our team was like, good again."
Brooks managed his emotions in a similar way when sidelined in 2025: His focus was again on basketball and what he loved and wanted, rather than on Nick Martinelli, the target of his envy. He saw helping Nick as a way to practice a new skill—coaching. He saw mentoring Nick as a way to continue to be a part of the game he loves and practice what he might do later. So when Nick succeeded, it meant he had, too. Nick Martinelli responded by becoming the leading scorer in the Big Ten Conference and Northwestern Men's Basketball season. Brooks harnessed his envy for good.
Both now play in the NBA, Barnhizer for the Oklahoma City Thunder and Martinelli for the Los Angeles Clippers.
Excerpted from Envy: Why Wanting What They Have is the Key to Getting What You Want by Stacy S. Kim, PhD. Copyright © 2026 by Stacy S. Kim, PhD. Reprinted with permission of Balance Publishing, an imprint of Hachette Book Group. All rights reserved.
Originally reported by wbez.